Sucks
At times like this, I can't help but think how pathetic my life is. Nothing seems to be going right, I feel like nowadays I keep bringing people not smiles nor laughter but irritation, anger, and sadness. I don't know whether it's me who brought such state to myself or people have simply stopped giving a damn about me. I feel so damn tired of everything and to add on, I think I'm falling sick soon.
Every aspect of my life was going well a few weeks before I had my O's. I guess I had it too well and that's why everything is going downhill. When O's was approaching, things started to get bad, I felt unhappy but I kept it to myself thinking that everything will be fine after awhile. Not understanding why and how things just got so bad now that I can't seem to see the end of this misery.
Telling my friends about my problem used to be the way to make me feel better, but somehow I can never find the right time nor the right person to say my problems to. I've been bottling too much in, it's getting so unbearable. I'm trying to blog everything out now and distract myself with videos and stories. The feeling gets away for a while but comes back right after.
I find myself struggling with relationships every single time. I want to put the blame entirely on me for every failed relationship I have with people, but a part of me tells me that, the other party probably contributed to it too. It's a two-way thing. People told me that I often overthink matters but is it really the case? Or is it them who overlooks the problem in front of them? Or maybe they are just too oblivious to sense certain things?
I remember my dad telling me, "Once it's gone, it's gone. Sometimes, things are better off as a memory." Maybe I'm just too engrossed in believing that certain things can be the way they were before. I guess maybe I have to let go of certain things to realise that life isn't just all about remaking memories but more on creating new ones and reminisce the old ones. It's okay if the people or place is gone, because as the saying goes, "Be off with the old, on with the new." I'm not going forget the people who had entered my life, I'll just be moving on I guess.
Year 2016 is arriving in a month's time. Though sad to leave behind the memories I've forged this year in 2015, I am still going to move on to year 2016 and forge newer better memories.
It's never easy growing up because you encounter so many feelings, problems and happiness that you've never felt before. However, I know I am not the only one who is in this. To the future me and to the future you, everything is going to be fine and everything you are going through will only make you tougher. The people you can't seem to let go now may turn out to be irrelevant as you grow or maybe just not as important as you thought they are going to be. Whatever happens, to the future us, good luck.
Jing Yi
Every aspect of my life was going well a few weeks before I had my O's. I guess I had it too well and that's why everything is going downhill. When O's was approaching, things started to get bad, I felt unhappy but I kept it to myself thinking that everything will be fine after awhile. Not understanding why and how things just got so bad now that I can't seem to see the end of this misery.
Telling my friends about my problem used to be the way to make me feel better, but somehow I can never find the right time nor the right person to say my problems to. I've been bottling too much in, it's getting so unbearable. I'm trying to blog everything out now and distract myself with videos and stories. The feeling gets away for a while but comes back right after.
I find myself struggling with relationships every single time. I want to put the blame entirely on me for every failed relationship I have with people, but a part of me tells me that, the other party probably contributed to it too. It's a two-way thing. People told me that I often overthink matters but is it really the case? Or is it them who overlooks the problem in front of them? Or maybe they are just too oblivious to sense certain things?
I remember my dad telling me, "Once it's gone, it's gone. Sometimes, things are better off as a memory." Maybe I'm just too engrossed in believing that certain things can be the way they were before. I guess maybe I have to let go of certain things to realise that life isn't just all about remaking memories but more on creating new ones and reminisce the old ones. It's okay if the people or place is gone, because as the saying goes, "Be off with the old, on with the new." I'm not going forget the people who had entered my life, I'll just be moving on I guess.
Year 2016 is arriving in a month's time. Though sad to leave behind the memories I've forged this year in 2015, I am still going to move on to year 2016 and forge newer better memories.
It's never easy growing up because you encounter so many feelings, problems and happiness that you've never felt before. However, I know I am not the only one who is in this. To the future me and to the future you, everything is going to be fine and everything you are going through will only make you tougher. The people you can't seem to let go now may turn out to be irrelevant as you grow or maybe just not as important as you thought they are going to be. Whatever happens, to the future us, good luck.
Jing Yi
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